Normalizing change
The need for change is constant: quiet quitting, quiet firing, frequent layoffs. This is the world we are in today. Unfortunately, when we grow old, the ability or willingness to change shrinks. The same happens when companies grow bigger and get older. Startups on the contrary, can change and adapt faster. Research shows that only 30% of all changes are successful because people grow weary of changing when efforts are unsuccessful or unsustainable over time.
Still, change is coming more often nowadays, with new technologies helping to make changes and innovation faster than ever. Ten years ago you would stay in a position with the same boss for three years; today you luckily enjoy the same boss and same position for no longer than 6 months. A skill that needs to be developed to thrive in this context is to normalize change.
How to normalize change
How can you help reduce negative thoughts, reduce resistance and avoid the fear of what is to come? Peter Sholtes in his book The Leader’s Handbook would say “people actually don’t resist change; people resist being changed. If you want to minimize resistance to change, involve people.”
1) Focus on what you can control: learn from the change, keep a positive attitude and simply keep walking, do what you have to do without overthinking. Train your muscles to become more comfortable performing in new situations by doing new things, such as learning salsa, rock climbing, or singing. Make time to explore, pursue a new experience, and, if possible, put yourself in the position of student, novice, or beginner.
2) Trust what you can’t control: trust that you (and the others) are doing the best you can and that later on, everything will make more sense. If you are in a crisis, or uncomfortable, it means change is coming. Normalize it by accepting crises are normal and are not the end of the world. Besides the discomfort, they always bring something good. Focus on the good instead of the bad! Accepting what you cannot control gives you more power and energy to focus on what you can control.
3) Embrace failure. Accept that failure or making mistakes is an option. Do not see failure as something bad but just a part of the process, helps people become more creative in the long term. If people are punished when something doesn’t go as planned, they will avoid trying or proposing something new, something innovative, altogether. So failure, being wrong, and trying are critical elements in the exploration process to achieve innovation. Petr Diamandis, co-founder of Singularity University says in his blog “The day before something is a breakthrough, it is a crazy idea.”
4) Be compassionate with others (and with yourself). Listen to their fears, empathize with them, and help them find what they can control.
Change is painful, but it is needed to guide you in the right direction. You need it in small doses, just like a push, to move to the next stage. As long as you accept it, overcome the difficulties, and remain longer in positive thoughts, change is productive and healthy. Some levels of stress and anxiety can actually improve your performance.
As long as you keep your purpose in mind and practice how, not just to accept but how to embrace change and be happy about it, growth will come. Learn to normalize it and grieving will be less painful.
