A number of actors advise pursuing this very demanding career only if you can’t feel right doing anything else.
For their magazine interview about working together in “Nine Perfect Strangers,” Manny Jacinto asked Nicole Kidman:
I am really curious, when you started out, what was your guiding compass?
Kidman: I was 14 when I started, so I just had this desire to work. I just wanted to get experience and be in the work. So I’d gone to little drama schools on the weekend.
I talk about moments where it’s in your blood and you just don’t have a choice about acting.
It’s almost like acting finds you…
I remember Jane Campion saying to me, “Protect your talent.”
I see you doing that, and it’s beautiful and so important. Protect your spirit. She wrote it to me when I was really young and I remember being like, “What does that mean?”
But there is a sense of needing to protect the talent so that it doesn’t get used and abused, right?
Jacinto: Absolutely. You can be the hottest thing and then burn out. I’m trying to prepare myself for the marathon, not the sprint. I’ll definitely take those words.
Kidman: I try to put them into action in my life. I haven’t always been successful, but I try.
The artistic journey is long, but I’m so happy and grateful to be a part of yours and will be happy to watch it explode as well. I see it. People just love you. I’m not saying it lightly. They all ask me about you.
Jacinto: Oh my goodness. Before we end, are there any other words of wisdom that you really held to your heart throughout your acting journey?
Kidman: I’m always seeking what I don’t know. That’s where I operate from. And at times, it’s really frightening and exciting, but it can feel very untethered at times.
But, don’t be frightened of that. Fear is the one thing that can cripple you.
Get to that sense of young-actor abandonment. It’s such a wonderful thing to hold onto.
Because it’s always, “Okay, well I tried that. Whatever the end result is, as long as I’ve gone in there and done everything I can to do to explore it and have it be as true and as real as possible. I don’t control the outcome of it.
From article “Protect Your Talent”: Manny Jacinto in Conversation with Nicole Kidman By Nicole Kidman, Interview, Sep 21, 2021.
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It can help to be aware of what is really driving you to be a performer or other artist:
Is it fame? Escape from normalcy or a mundane life? The promise of a big income? Dealing with traumatic experiences?
Those aren’t simply “good” or “bad” motivations, but when you are more conscious about your passions, you are more in charge, and less likely to feel defeated or wrong if, for example, you don’t get a callback for a particular audition.
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“I really believe that what I do as an actress is my God-given talent.
“This is my calling, not my career.” – Angela Bassett
(Also quoted in my article Building Your Most Creative and Satisfying Life in the Arts.)
Photo: Angela Bassett and Chadwick Boseman in Black Panther, 2018.
Not always easy, and you don’t feel good all the time.
Kate Drummond talked about a “misconception that if you have a passion for something and a dream that you’re aiming to achieve, that it should be easy and should always feel good.
“It’s not true.
“The road is jagged and rocky, but I have learned that if I keep taking even the tiniest steps forward, that I’ll get through those tough times.”
She tries to “look at the really difficult times, when I feel like I just want to pack it all in, as a test from the universe.
“It’s like the universe is saying to me, ‘How badly do you want this? Because we need you to be so strong and ready for when it happens.
‘So, we’re going to put you through these little tests along the way, and if you’re going to take your ball and go home when things get tough – then you’re not ready for your big dream.’
“I know it might sounds silly, but that’s how I try to view every obstacle or set back that comes up.”
She talked about how you mentally frame experiences:
“I try to remind myself that it’s not rejection, it’s redirection. It doesn’t mean no, it just means not this way or not right now.
“During times when I’ve wanted to quit the most, out of sheer stubbornness I’ve made myself keep going and given myself another chance, and then literally – within days – everything changed for me.”
From interview “Kate Drummond: There’s Always More to Learn,” Gore Mutual site, September 26, 2019.
(Photo: Kate Drummond from her Facebook page.)
Artists in Depth podcast: Ep.1 In Depth with Kate Drummond.
This podcast with Alan Powell & Bill Key is also at artistsindepth.com – notes include: “Our discussion with Kate encapsulated everything that Artists in Depth stands for and that we all can relate too, including her fearless search for herself through the artistry of acting to fusing with characters she plays to her achilles heal of needing approval and finding her ‘mama bear’ voice.”
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Loving what you do – even when you doubt.
“Acting and music are self indulgent professions and they are a luxury unless you love what you do.
“I have a love/hate relationship with what I do. I think, ‘Where’s the relevance of this? I’m not a doctor, I’m not an aid worker.’
“But then I think you only have one life and I am a vessel for stories to be told.” – Samantha Morton
(Quotes from her imdb bio; photo from article “Samantha Morton: ‘Maybe I was the first person to publicly answer Weinstein’” by Danny Leigh, The Guardian, 2 Oct 2018.)
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Creative people and the challenges of arts careers
Dr. Mihaela Ivan Holtz of Creative Minds Psychotherapy helps creative people in TV/Film, performing and fine arts.
In one of her articles for entertainment business site Stage 32, she addresses some of what draws creative people to arts careers, and some of the many challenges.
- Dr. Holtz writes:
You love being an artist. When you create, you feel at home in your own realm of imagination, fantasy, and storytelling.
It feels meaningful and it feels right.
At the same time, you don’t necessarily feel happy or fully satisfied with your career.
You feel that your reality doesn’t quite match your dreams, and that’s a challenging place to be.
It’s hard to feel like you aren’t getting where you want to be in your career.
You keep asking yourself why you’re so stuck.
Did I make the wrong choice to be an artist? Did I overestimate my talent? Am I living in a fantasy world? How did I ever think this is possible?
After all, everyone else says being successful in the arts field is like hitting the jackpot.
How do you bridge the gap between your dreams and reality?
Acknowledge That Creativity is Essential to Who You Are
Only you get to decide if you are a true artist or not.
If you find yourself deeply connected to something greater than yourself when you create, you are an artist.
Continue reading her article (on the Stage 32 site):
When You Aren’t Achieving What You Want in Your Artistic Career, What Do You Do?
Emotional distance sometimes
Dr. Holtz writes about artists needing “talent, dedication, passion…and emotional boundaries.
“When you are in love with something your emotional boundaries become very fluid, almost like a dance – the dance of intimacy and love.
“Your passion wants you to let your emotional boundaries melt and you become one with what you love. Creating and performing becomes one with you, flowing together.”
But she notes, “there are the times when you want to be a little more detached from your art. Although still connected authentically, you seek some emotional distance.”
From my article Building emotional boundaries to be more creative.
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Maria Bello commented in a conversation with Carrie-Anne Moss for Interview mag.:
“My best friend at college, Villanova University, was an Augustinian priest named Father Ray Jackson, who co-founded this educational program called the Center for Peace and Justice Education, and he wrote a book about it.
“He asked me to edit the book, so I spent a couple of summers in the university library, and every day Father Jackson asked me, “How are you going to serve?”
“So it was a difficult decision for me to become an actor because I was on my way to law school. But I realized that you serve by doing the thing you love, doing it well, and being conscious about what you’re giving to the world.” [Interview magazine, April, 2004]
[Photo from video about her book on identity labels – see post: Identity and Being Creative.]
Fame is not enough
Actor and teacher Jamie Rose comments on her site jamierosehere.com:
“Too many actors.. concentrate all of their energies on getting an agent etc. and don’t spend enough time on becoming great actors.
“If you are only about outward success – fame money etc., I promise that there will never be enough of it to fill you up…”
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Part of doing what you’re meant to do is learning to disregard the seduction of fame, or the pressure of other people saying it isn’t right for you.
Suzanne Falter-Barns, who writes and leads workshops on finding and living your life purpose, asks in her article Finding Your Niche in Life, “Are you willing to rise above everyone else’s agenda for you, and carve out the niche that is rightfully yours.. and honor your greater self instead? Are you willing to be known as the tremendous, quirky soul that you are?“
She gives as an example Roger the Jester, “a wonderful, original performer” who, after unsuccessful stabs at psychology and photojournalism, “landed on jesting by asking himself what he wanted to spend the rest of his life doing.”
“What I really liked was making people laugh, and goofing off,” Roger said.
“Once I got booked for a show and they told me, ‘We’d just like you to carry on.’ Well, that’s what my mother used to yell at me — ‘Will you stop carrying on?’ And now, here I was, carrying on and getting paid for it.”
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Douglas Eby (M.A./Psychology) is author of the The Creative Mind series of sites which provide “Information and inspiration to help creative people thrive.”
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