How to Help Clients Understand What Motivates Them
Recently, I’ve grown fascinated with motivation. I’ve recognized that motivation is the most powerful — and among the most misunderstood — forces in the entire world.
This increased interest started when I was wrapping up my first book, “Seven Steps to Dominate Your Day and Crush Your Goals.” A friend’s feedback on my first draft struck a chord: “I don’t struggle with knowing what to do. I struggle with being motivated to do what I know I should do.”
These sentiments resonated with me for two reasons. First, I could relate. I know how to keep myself healthy, grow my business, and build meaningful relationships with family and close friends. What often holds me back isn’t a lack of knowledge but focus, discipline, or energy.
More importantly, I began to think about the potential that an increase in motivation could offer. If a lack of motivation was the obstacle that held people back from achieving their goals, what becomes possible when you learn how to tap into that motivation and center it on whatever you want to accomplish? If someone could learn to focus their motivation, they could do anything.
In the next few days, I reflected on what I believed about motivation. I realized that most people don’t understand or approach motivation correctly. I hear people say things like, “I’m just not that motivated” or “I wish I had motivation.”
The truth is that we all have the same amount of motivation. Motivation plays a role in everything we do. The problem most people encounter is not a lack of motivation but a lack of awareness about how motivation works and what truly motivates them.
This newfound awareness is not only valuable on a personal level but also incredibly valuable in coaching. As you think about helping your clients examine their motivation, here are a few strategies to use.
1) Consider Potential Costs and Rewards
Every action includes both a cost and a reward. We often prioritize activities that offer a more immediate reward, even with a higher long-term cost. For example, eating an unhealthy meal may taste better in the moment, but it could inhibit future weight loss or athletic performance.
On the other hand, actions that are difficult in the moment usually have a greater long-term reward. We must be willing to sacrifice momentary comfort and security for long-term growth and development.
When clients evaluate multiple options, help them understand the sacrifices required for each choice and what benefits the action could offer in return. Ask questions such as, “What are you gaining by making that choice?” or “What would that decision cost you?”
2) Evaluate All Sources of Motivation
When torn between multiple options, it is often because we feel competing motivations. You want to wake up early to exercise or journal before your workday starts, but you also want to remain in bed because it’s comfortable.
If you don’t understand all sources of motivation in play, you might believe you lack motivation. However, what’s actually happening is that you feel more motivated to maintain a sense of comfort or security.
If you’re working with a client who seems stuck or is struggling to move forward, ask them what other motivations may be present. Encourage them to explore ways to increase motivation for desired results or decrease motivation to engage in undesired activities. They don’t have to feel 100% motivated to act they only need to tip the scales in their favor.
3) Encourage Clients to Use Commitment Devices
Commitment devices are important because motivation and willpower are very different. While we all have the same amount of motivation, willpower waxes and wanes depending on the situation. By using commitment devices, you can decrease (or eliminate) the need for willpower.
For instance, when I make a commitment, I am much more likely to follow through with it if I tell a friend about my plans. This makes me accountable to someone else, not just myself. I do not want to feel embarrassed if my friend asks me about my progress and I haven’t kept my commitment.
Commitment devices can be a great tool to use when helping clients build accountability. When they determine what action to take, ask them how they could lock in their decision with a commitment device. When this happens, they won’t depend on their ability to develop or maintain willpower.
Brady Ross, ACC
Brady Ross, ACC, is an accomplished author, coach, and podcaster residing in Edmond, OK, USA, alongside his wife and two young children. He’s passionate about helping people unlock deeper sources of motivation to pursue their most important goals. Presently, he serves as the President of ICF Arkansas-Oklahoma Charter Chapter. Earlier this year, Brady published his first book, Seven Steps to Dominate Your Day and Crush Your Goals. To delve further into Brady’s journey, visit his website at bradyross.com or tune into his podcast, “Motivation for Regular People.”
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