A Coaching Power Tool By Adella St.Rose, Self-Leadership Coach, SAINT LUCIA
Powerlessness: A Context
For centuries there has been exploration of what it means to be powerful. Oxford Dictionary defines powerful as “ (of people) being able to control and influence people and events.” A simple search of the web will immediately provide lists of persons in history who have been titled the most powerful in history. Repetitively familiar names like Jesus, Alexander the Great, Genghis Kahn, Muhammad, and Buddha can easily be found. A search for the powerless however proves a lot harder, there is no immediate list of persons.
What is the difference between Powerless vs. Hopeful?
Powerlessness Defined
Powerless(ness) is defined by the APA Dictionary of Psychology as “a state in which individuals either lack or believe that they lack control or influence over factors or events that affect their health (mental or physical), personal lives, or the society in which they live.”
Iris Young in her article “Five Faces of Oppression” [i] states the idea of powerlessness is linked to socialism theory. It is characterized finitely with some having power and some not having power thereby making them powerless. The concept of powerlessness is often explored in the context of external factors creating a sense of powerlessness for example the right to vote historically for black people, equal rights for women, and same-sex marriage. Young references Harriet Tubman’s writing which spoke of the freeing of slaves, Tubman stated “I would have freed thousands more if they had known they were slaves.” In this, she references the mindset of slaves- powerless. To be powerless can certainly be a physical state and in many situations today it is a mindset, a way of thinking, feeling, and believing.
Hopeful a Definition
To be hopeful is defined as “having hope or causing you to hope; believing or causing you to believe that something desired will happen.”[ii] To further explore Hope Theory, founder Charles Snyder states, “Hope is the belief that your future will be better than the present and that you have the ability to make it happen. It involves both optimism and a can-do attitude.”[iii]
Hope Theory is characterized by having goals, agency willpower, and pathways. It speaks to the fundamental belief that an individual can create change through their way of thinking and their actions.
Powerlessness in Coaching
Often in coaching, clients can come to the coaching space with a deep sense of powerless, often characterized by the feeling of having no control over their current situation. Clients express sentiments like; feeling something or someone is pushing or pulling them without them having any control, other persons having more power than they do leaving them with no power over themselves or a situation, in essence leaving them powerless.
To illustrate a client entered the coaching space angry and disbelieving that after many years, of what they characterized as dedicated service, their employer had without them having any control or input into the situation decided that they needed to part company and terminate their employment. The client had determined that they had no control over or within the injustice that was being intentionally done to them. They were powerless in the situation and as a result, stuck. The sense of powerlessness was so intense it shadowed the potential opportunities wanted and unwanted that the situation created. Despite the client having thought about leaving their employer prior, now faced with the reality, unexpectedly initiated by their employer they could not see a way to navigate within the circumstance.
The client’s sense of powerlessness created a spectrum that immediately placed them on one end (no power) and their employer on the other (all power). While the client looked outward, it continued to drain the client’s energy reinforcing their sense of powerlessness.
The client was invited to explore the possibilities that this change could present, asking them to project into the future and share the future they envisioned for themselves.
The exploration was guided by questions such as below;
- What could you gain by accepting this decision is not within your control?
- What would you do if you could choose what happens next?
- What would you need to feel less powerless in this situation?
- If you look forward to 12 months from now, how would you want to look back and see yourself?
- What would happen if you were in control of this situation?
- What would you want to feel in this situation?
By exploring these questions, the client began to focus on themselves and how they could show up in the situation. They were also able to explore what they wanted out of the situation, why they wanted it, and what their next steps could be. In doing so they became hopeful that the current situation was a chapter in their story and that they could in fact have a future designed by themselves. The act of projecting forward created the possibility that another having a power that impacts you did not have to automatically lead to powerlessness. The perspective that there could be an alternate future created a sense of hope. This hope, born from the feeling of being powerless, and its optimism was in fact stronger than the powerlessness felt.
Powerlessness is often felt when we contextualize our current state through a lens of trying to change a situation that we do not control when we desire another party to act in a way, we want them to do what is different from their actual behavior, when we claim our responses and behaviors are as a result of another’s actions. We are hurt, betrayed, disappointed, and unable to change our fate. When we think this way, we do not accept responsibility for our actions or our feelings. As a consequence, we become blind to our own desires and stuck in a cycle of blame and powerlessness that focuses on the external.
As a coach powerlessness can show up in session through the language a client uses to share a story and how they characterize themselves in the story. It is often steeped in blame, where someone else is responsible for your situation your action or inaction, and your lack of choice. It can be seen in phrases like, “I was forced to respond this way because they did this” or “I feel …….because of this person.” In these phrases, the client feels that they have no choice and they are powerless. They decide that the other party is responsible for their behavior. When the coach recognizes this, they can begin the explore with the client what their limiting beliefs about themselves in the situation are. The coach guides the exploration of what could be different if they accepted responsibility for themselves in the situation, their thoughts, actions, and inactions. If they were to move from the passenger seat to the driver’s seat and actively began to drive what possibilities could arise and where would they go? In doing so the coach is able to guide the client to flip their perspective.
The client’s flip in perspective created a sense of power in the form of hope.
Powerless vs. Hopeful
To further validate, an impromptu survey was sent to colleagues, friends, and family members having insight into the following.
When faced with having to consider if you were not powerless what would you be, the focus becomes a future focus in the present. This focus is often embodied in optimism, a feeling of strength, being in control, feeling confident, self-empowered, courage, a surrender to the present to allow for a future and multiple respondents noted to feel hopeful. One respondent stated, “Never render yourself powerless. An opening may suddenly emerge to give room to maneuver. So always remain open to the possibility.”[iv] These responses together with the clients’ experience have led to my selection of the flipped perspective of (being) hopeful.
This hopefulness acknowledges that in the present there is a challenge to be overcome. It does not minimize the reality of the clients’ present, it gives them a focus on the future.
When a client begins to become aware that while they cannot control the external, they can choose to control the internal. The internal including their internal dialogue, choice of response, and the resulting action is what shifts them from powerless to hopeful.
It is said life is our greatest teacher, as I reflect on moments in my life where I felt hopeful, I can recall a strong sense of purpose, and a willingness to act in a way that would bring to fruition what I hoped for. I would feel energized that my actions were intentionally taking me to a goal that I had set. Not only had I set it, but I had emotionally invested in achieving it in a way that was positive, not a dream or a wish but a tangible outcome that I was working to achieve. Clients often describe hope as a lighthouse that appeared when they worked to find a way through a situation where they felt powerless. These thoughts on hope are validated by a study done by Arizona State University[v] where John Parsi, executive director of the Hope Center stated, “Hope requires a person to take responsibility for their wants and desires and take action in working towards them. Optimistic people see the glass as half full, but hopeful people ask how they can fill the glass full.”
Within the coaching space, trusting my clients to know what is best for them, my clients will shift from Powerless to Hopeful, where anything is possible.
References
[i] Published in Opression, Privilege & Resistance, Lisa Hedke and Peg O’Connor (McGraw Hill, 2004)
[ii] HOPEFUL | English meaning – Cambridge Dictionary
[iii] Hope Psychology: What Are The Benefits of Hope? | Psych Central
[iv] Kenny D Anthony, Survey Respondent
[v] The science of hope: More than wishful thinking | Knowledge Enterprise (asu.edu)