Finding Compassion in the Awkward

With the move toward returning to the office in some fashion and with kids back in school this month, I’ve been leaning into more in-person meetings and gatherings of all kinds.

It feels like people are coming out of their cocoons and saying…let’s learn how to live in community again. A turn of events that makes this extrovert filled with butterflies and possibilities.

I’m saying yes to the invites and setting up coffees and lunches.

Yet, here’s what I’m noticing.

I’m rusty AF.

And I connect with people for a living!

On a good day I’m at least 20% more awkward than I was pre-pandemic.

When I walk away from an interaction at school drop off or when running into people, I’m often rolling some of the things I said around in my head thinking, “48 years into this ride and we couldn’t come up with something more empathetic? Thought-provoking? Award-winningly hilarious?

But, the moment has passed and the rumination builds momentum and heft in my stomach with every minute that passes.

I’ve been working to disrupt the spinning with a simple self compassion practice.

I talk to the awkward part of me and I tell her…

That person has already forgotten this moment that’s turning you inside out.

You are working to rebuild this muscle and the road to get there will be messy.

You are coming from a place of truth.

Many people are drawn to your awkward side.


Sometimes it takes a few times to break through and that’s ok. I do find a place of calm in this approach.

It helps me walk into the next gathering with realistic expectations (I probably will say the “wrong thing” at some point) and a way to move through it if/when I do (by being nice to that inner awkward girl).

I hope you can give yourself some grace as you begin reconnecting with your communities. Whether it’s using my practice or creating your own – go easy, enjoy your people. Know if they are the right people, they will see you and love you as you are.

Rachel GarrettComment