The Compassionate Debrief

So, you had your first interview in a looong time. Now what?

Let’s get the easy, tactical thing out of the way.

Yes, the answer is - you DO need to write a thank you note.

After each interview, write a thoughtful note - ideally within 24 hours of the meeting. In my opinion, it does not need to be a handwritten note. I prefer an email (so put that pretty stationary back in your drawer for when you write your best friend an, "I miss you." love letter).

The note should contain a nugget from the conversation so your interviewer knows you were paying attention! Also, if you interviewed with more than one person...send them each unique notes. Interviewers do compare!

Next, comes the most important tool in your interview arsenal. I call it, The Compassionate Debrief and I tell my clients to do it after each interview.

First - focus on your wins.

The obvious one being – I had my first interview since 2018 and I didn’t die.

But really, what went well? Where did you shine? How dynamic and spunky was your elevator pitch delivery (after practicing it a thousand times with your dog - thanks, Taco!)? How great does that top look on Zoom? Excellent choice!

Then, without shame and with all the grace you can offer yourself, list the areas you’d like to improve for your next interview. And I promise there will be a next one.

How can you smooth out that story about showing leadership in a crisis with a more succinct and clear approach?

How can you put a more positive spin on leaving a role where you’re still experiencing all the feelings?

This judgment-free zone of The Compassionate Debrief acknowledges –

Interviews are hard.

You may not be good at them right away.

You can learn how to get better at them over time.

The way you do that is with reflection and intentional fine-tuning and practice.


If you don’t get the job, ask for feedback. Even though I’ve found feedback comes only 10-15% of the time, sometimes it can be an absolutely critical piece of wisdom that makes all the difference in your next round of interviews.

Also know that finding a job is about fit. Sometimes when you don’t get the job, you may have dodged a bullet because of something in their culture or leadership approach that was not going to be a fit with your style.

Believe that there is not only one great opportunity out there for you, but many. With a combination of belief, knowledge that you’re worthy of that next great role, patience, practice and prep—in time—you will get there too.

Rachel GarrettComment